Don't seem to have any drive to do anything. Still feel damn hollow inside. I seriously wanna study but... shit, I just don't know. I/S is very dead, and so will I be in September if I don't start on it. Soon. &#!(*@)^! Holi-frickin'-day. Sure.
Laugh, smile, exude enthusiasm, joke? No problem. Feeling anything inside? Not really. Just extremes & such. Like love, anger, weariness, nostalgia. I can't bring myself to be really feel stuff. I'm thinking about grandma quite often too. I miss her. Sometimes, she'd just pop into my head when I see something. Things that remind me of her, or even random things. :(
The past 2 days have mostly been ohkay, aka nice times. We went to play Halo at Rubin's again yesterday, brought my sis along too! Got a present from the guys, haha. They added 2 more Eeyores to my collection & one cute lil bear thing! Whee, thanks very much. :) for the gifts & the fantastic times. And for enduring the lousy music at Minitoons also. Haha.
Went to NUSS Guild House at Suntec for family dinner & after-dinner stuff. The carbonara there is delicious. Drank some strawsarita thing which turned out to be alcoholic. First legal alcohol drink. Heh. You know, sometimes I like the taste of alcohol. And sometimes, I find it repulsive. Blah.
Service learning today at the zoo was awesome, despite the nagging headache & lingering tiredness from the day before. :) the kids were great & really cute too. Reminded me a lot of Cambodia... The experience was truly unforgettable. Sigh. Nostalgia, shoo!
Okay, damnit. I really dunno why I feel so emptyish. I just know I feel this way. Joyce mentioned that I look quite haggard. Maybe there's just too many things on my mind now. =/ I appear even more stoned than usual. Never knew that was possible. -_-P.S. The entire moon was glowing red last night. :) it was really pretty & a lil scary.
And all these emotions of mine
Keep holding me from
Giving my life to a rainbow like you
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